CoNvIcTiOnS~
by Hotpunk87
Summary: About Sirius Black, before during and after Azkaban. Some bad language but since Im 13 I decided that should be good enough. Chapter 3 added 4/19
1. Convictions

~CoNvIcTiOnS~

__

"Some of life's challenges must be faced alone. The real test of your convictions will come when no one is watching and you must answer to only yourself..." by anonymous.

Hello. I am Hotpunk, I just wanted to say I hope you like this story, I am not that good a writer but I hope to improve by using fanfic so please tell me how I can improve my stories! thanks! Please read my other stories too! P.S. Madeline is pronounced Mad-uh-Lyn not Mad-uh-line

~*~

Madeline Day Caswell stared at the newspaper, not daring to believe... to believe that the man she loved, caused the death of her best friends... A tear trickled down her cheek and suddenly she felt an outburst of rage come over her. She grabbed a vase from the table next to her and hurled in against the wall. She looked at the picture on the front cover. It was of Sirius; next to it was a picture of Lily and James. She stared at the picture of Sirius. It was taken just as they dragged him away. His face is pulled into a horrified yell. She swore he was yelling "I'm innocent" but she immediately discarded that thought. _I'm just seeing that because I want him innocent... that bastard... how could he do that? To... to Lily and James? And Harry... poor Harry... he'll have to live with those muggles..._ She shook her head again as she watched the picture of Sirius, yelling silent words to her.

~*~

Sirius stared at the wall. He looked back down at the paper. The rat on the boy's shoulder... the rat who deserved this place... the place Sirius had been burdened upon. He knew where he had to go... but how he'll manage it? _Who knows... but now's my only chance... _he thought to himself as he transformed. He felt the same queasiness he had gotten used to, as his organs mutated to that of a dog. He felt the sudden coldness of Dementors... he heard the door open. He glanced up. He saw his chance to escape... and he did. He ran quickly out of that god-forsaken place never daring to look back. He jumped into the water and swam. He swam for hours. Till his legs ached and he felt himself choking on the water then suddenly he felt land on his paws. He dragged himself ashore and collapsed almost immediately. He dragged himself into a small cave with bushes and brush hiding it from view. He lied down in there but stayed awake. 

~--*--~

__

"I sit down, but I can rest for only a moment

For with freedom come responsibilities,

And I dare not linger, for my long walk

Is not ended." --anonymous

~--*--~

Sirius saw the lights... the lights of searching people. All searching for him. He backed up to the wall in the cave, his eyes lingering on a small carving in the wall... suddenly he realized why this cave seemed so familiar... in the wall the inscription read 

SB+MC 4 ever

He sighed. _So much for "4 ever". _He remembered the day Maddy and himself carved that there... painful memories but good ones. _Lily and James had carved too..._ He looked around the cave then he spotted it in James' messy writing.

JP + LE forever!

He let out a faint whimper. _For ever wasn't really that long, was it James? Lily? I'll kill that rat if it's the last thing I do in this cursed world... _He thought bitterly. Then he put his head down on his paws. A light shined in there.

"Hey! Guys there's a dog in here!"

Sirius could hear a faint voice, obviously quite a bit away.

"Sirius Black ain't no dog, keep looking!"

~--*--~

__

"The beginner often sees what the

Expert overlooks. No amount of

Knowledge is more than a genuine

Passion for learning" 

--Anonymous

~--*--~

__

Yeah you think you're so smart... actually Sirius Black is a dog at the moment!

The man shined the light around the cave. He stopped on SB + MC 4 ever. 

"Didn't Black used to have a girlfriend? Madeline... Madeline Caswell..." He said to himself thoughtfully. Then he shrugged and walked away.

When the voices and lights receded, Sirius let his eyes droop shut. He slept far into the next day and woke up at sunset, knowing exactly where he needed to go... Hogwarts.

~*~

Madeline (Maddy) Caswell walked along the road at Hogsmede. She loved just coming there seeing what familiar faces she will see and what interesting pranks the Hogwarts students will play. She always prayed she would see Harry but she never spotted him. She only spotted two redhead boys... _They must be weasley's... that hair is too recognizable. _She thought to herself. She watched a group of boys being scolded. They looked horrified as the large woman scolded them then when she walked away they exchanged glances and broke down in laughter. _So much like when we were in Hogwarts. So resilient. We quickly got over the guilt of being in trouble to go cause some more. _She smiled slightly and walked to one of the prank shops. She immediately recognized the woman at the counter.

"Oh my god..." She said slowly. The woman looked at her and nearly fell over. She smiled and ran over.

"Maddy!" She yelled as she hugged her.

"O h my god! Fi!" She hugged her friend, Fiora Alana Boarkes tightly. When she pulled back she had tears streaming down her face. "I thought you moved!"

"I did! I came back!"

Maddy couldn't reply she was too happy to find one of her old friends.

Fiora suddenly swung around.

"Hey! Don't touch those! You might-" There was a loud crash as a mirror fell from the wall. 

"FRED! GEORGE! BOTH OF YOU! YOUR LUCKY I WON'T TELL YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THIS!" she roared over the commotion. Maddy watched Fred and George who were struggling back laughs.

Fiora took a deep breath and spoke calmly. "Clean up this mess and I won't make you buy it." The twins nodded and began sweeping it up as they already got the picture they weren't aloud to use magic.

She turned back to Maddy and grinned. "Fred and George Weasley. Big time troublemakers. Of course this doesn't happen much with causing trouble _inside _the shop but I've seen them plenty of times outside of here."

"How long have you been here?"

"Since August. Why haven't I seen you around here before?"

"So you've been here for 6 months. Wow I don't know, I've been coming here I guess you just weren't in."

"Yeah, I usually come during the week... but its much more interesting on weekends..." She said glancing at the twins with a twinkle of amusement in her unusually colored eyes. Fiora was a little strange in many ways, same with Maddy. Fiora's most unusual feature was her eyes. Her eyes were brown with a red tint that shone brightly but they had green and blue flecks giving a beautiful illusion with her fluttery blond hair. Maddy's hair was naturally brown with a tint of plum... everyone thought she dyed it but those were her natural color. Her highly unusual deep violet eyes shone brown when she was bored or in a bad mood. Her eyes at the moment were shining the brightest violet they had been in ages. 

Maddy laughed at Fiora's comment. "Oh, yes, I have been coming to hogsmede on weekends for a year or two now just to see the Hogwarts kids and the pranks they pull. Last year I even helped with one."

"Not out of the old tricks eh?" Fiora said with a hint of amusement in her eyes again.

"No, I'll never grow out of the old tricks!" she laughed. Fiora grinned.

"Well I better get back to working... Send me an owl sometime... you know where my flat is!"

"Same one as it used to be?"

"Same!" She said as she walked across the store.

Maddy turned and walked out of the store smiling broadly. She noticed how young Fiora looked. _Not a gray hair in sight! _She thought. Maddy's hair, which had the tendency to blend her gray hairs to look plum, had no gray but she knew it was only because of her unusual bloodline. Instead of getting gray hairs Maddy got plum hairs. How amusing. She thought grimly then laughed. She looked around wondering where to go next.

~*~

Sirius ran into the forbidden forest, panting harshly. _Stupid... stupid... stupid... _he thought to himself as he looked back up at the school. _Jesus, I have to learn to control my temper... _Sirius thought. He had just done a rather stupid thing and lost his temper when the fat lady wouldn't let him into the Gryffindor area. He sighed. _This will be harder than I thought... but I will do it... I don't care how long it takes or how much I hurt myself doing it... I will kill Peter Pettigrew..._

~--*--~

__

"The first step is the hardest. Take the

Inniciative to act, and the momentum

Will carry you further than you ever

Thought possible."

--Anonymous

~--*--~

Days past and months past. Maddy was beginning to feel restless but she always felt this hopeful stab whenever she spotted a black dog. She knew it was bad to hope that a convicted murder was ok... but she had loved Sirius... she had loved him more than life itself and it was hard to make that feeling go away.

It was now the end of June. Hogwarts students were heading home. Maddy headed out to find Fiora who had been meeting her regularly in Hogsmede on Saturdays.

"Maddy! MADDY!!" she heard Fiora calling. She looked to her right. Fi was running towards her.

"Hey Fi. Whats up?"

Fi looked very serious. "What is it?" Maddy repeated.

"look at this." Fiora handed Maddy the _Daily Prophet _for today.

'Black Escapes Yet Again'

Maddy read it aloud.

"Yesterday, Sirius Black was caught at Hogwarts. He had put a spell over three students so they believed he was innocent. Prof. Severus Snape had brought in Black after the Dementors knocked him and the students out. According to Albus Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts, Black just seemed to have disappeared while he was checking on Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger, the three students also involved. We warn you all that Black could be anywhere but we are leaning towards the fact that he has fled but-" 

Maddy stopped. She couldn't continue reading it.

Fiora, sensing the sadness she felt, took the paper from her. "I'm sorry. Maybe I shouldn't have shown you that..."

"No. It's ok... I just... I just... I don't think Sirius is guilty... but I know he is... but I just can't believe that! Am I making sense?"

"Yes. I understand. Come on. Let's go have some fun... get our minds off of this? I just heard that Remus is part of it too... I just think you might want to know... he claimed Sirius was innocent too..."

Maddy looked up. 

Fiora continued. "I normally would trust him right away, but I am not sure about this one... Do you have the urge to find Remus and ask him?"

Maddy begged she would say that and immediately nodded at that, feeling unable to talk. _Remus never lies... and he's strong enough to overcome some curse like that... _

~--*--~

__

"The impact of our actions goes far beyond 

Our own lives. Take into account how 

Others will be affected by what you say

And do" 

--Anonymous

~--*--~

--======-

like? Don't like? Tell me in a review! Oh and if I don't get a resonable amount of reviews I don't think I'll continue.

~Hotpunk


	2. Sorry

__

~CoNvIcTiOnS~

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it."

--Anonymous

Hey! This is Hotpunk again! I want to thank all that reviewed! I LUV YOU ALL! And I hate you all who didn't review... hehe I'm so harsh. But really. I got very little reviews. Please make me happier this time... please note that I was so close to ending this story but I decided if I get any less than what I got last time then I am not continuing... (If you don't review than you hate the story so why should I continue?)

~*~

Maddy and Fiora urgently made their way towards Remus' house. It was shabby looking from his absence to Hogwarts but it looked as though recently it had been worked on. Maddy stopped. _What if he was under the spell..? I don't think I can take it if I'm sure Sirius is guilty. _She saw a curtain move and Remus' stunned face peer out. He quickly vanished and reappeared as he opened his door, his jaw dropped then he grinned.

"Fiora! Maddy! I don't believe it!" He exclaimed hugging them both.

"Hey Remus! I had heard you were here and.. Well I think Maddy and I want to know what has been going on," She said a little awkwardly. 

HE grinned and nodded, but then he frowned. "Are you going to believe me?" he asked doubtfully. He knew Fiora too well. She always believed the ministry couldn't make mistakes. She smiled slightly.

"Yes. I had a conflict with the ministry. If your stories believable then I will believe it." Remus grinned slightly and let them both in.

~--*--~

__

"Relationships are a blessing and a responsibility. 

Take care to let your words and deeds convey the right

Message to those who look up to you."

--Anonymous

~--*--~

Sirius couldn't believe what had happened that day, days before. He had been at Hogwarts. Harry knew the truth. Remus knew the truth. Dumbledore even knew the truth. If Peter hadn't escaped it would have been a great day. But Sirius was still guilty. Peter was still alive. And Maddy didn't know the truth. He was far from Hogwarts by now. He was preparing to let himself be seen to lift security from Hogwarts. Once that was done, he would set off. Journeying had become a big part of his life, since he had no where else to stay. It kept him busy. It will have to do.

~*~

Remus led Fiora and Maddy into the house. It was well treated on the inside unlike the outside. It was a very modern house and was so clean. Maddy felt very out of place. She followed behind Fi and Remus till they got to the living room. Remus gestured for them to sit down. 

"Make yourselves at home. Fiora I thought you moved? Mind explaining that to me?"

"Certainly. I moved back!" She said with a smile.

"Yes... but why?" He asked curiously.

"Curiosity killed the cat Remus."

"If it will kill Mrs. Norris I wouldn't mind a bit. I still hate that cat. Isn't much trouble when you're a teacher though..."

Fiora laughed and noticed Maddy looking rather uncomfortable.

Maddy glanced at her and spoke before she could think about what she was saying 

"How about you tell us now about Sirius."

Remus raised a brow at her. 

"You still have a horrible temper. Almost as bad as Sirius'." He said pointedly. Maddy sat back in the chair and allowed him to continue.

"First off: He's innocent."

Fiora raised a brow "I want proof."

"I can't give you the proof at the moment, only my word, but I'll tell you the story."

Fiora nodded. "Good enough."

Maddy was a little stunned _He's innocent! He's innocent! _She was cheering to herself inside her head, and then she tuned it out to listen to Remus.

~*~

Months passed. It was nearly the end of Harry's fourth year. Sirius paced back and fourth in Dumbledore's office.

"Sirius, please calm down. I actually understand why James chose you to be his godfather now... at first I thought you were a little too immature to take on the role."

Sirius grunted. Usually a joke would have been there but Sirius was too worried about Harry. He knew this was a setup. It was planned... by ... by someone... 

Only then did Sirius look up. Dumbledore had left. He glanced out the window. He saw a crowd of people standing there, and Dumbledore striding up to the crowd. Sirius pulled back not daring to watch what had happened...

~--*--~

__

"Very rarely is a situation forced upon us.

Be aware of your power to choose, and 

Take responsibility for what you allow

To happen."

--Anonymous

~--*--~

Maddy sat up suddenly in bed. She had tears streaming down her face. _I wish that dream was true…_she said to herself. Lily and James had been there… and Sirius. She missed them all. She had found Remus and Fiora and that helped a lot but she needed Sirius. Now that she knew Sirius was innocent she had found the urge to just go and find him. She heard a tapping on the window and looked over. An owl was they're carrying a note. She opened the letter and took it opening it up right away.

She read it aloud to herself

Dear Maddy,

Have you heard? Cedric Diggory was killed! Harry and Cedric had gotten to the cup first and both got it when they were transported right to Voldemort! That is so scary! Cedric was killed by _Avada Kedavra_ but Harry got out and brought Cedrics body too. Have you even seen Harry yet? He looks so much like James its scary! But he has Lily's eyes. Please write me back soon! Oh and I hope your feeling better! Bye!

Love,

Fi

She stared at the paper a bit. Then went to her desk to grab a quill and some parchment. She grabbed her favorite violet ink (to match her eyes) and started writing.

Dear Fi,

Is Harry all right… not hurt at all? That boy will keep on amazing everyone wont he. No I haven't seen him yet but I have heard that he looks a lot like James. I do hope to see him soon though. Yes I'm feeling better thanks; I don't know what came over me… I just… well all the memories of James and Lily and even Sirius came to me then. I really want to see Sirius… he's innocent! I still can't believe it… I know I'm going on and on about one stupid thing but I can't stand it… Well I better go… bye!

Love,

Madeline Day Caswell

PS. Don't ask me why I put my whole name.

Maddy read over the message and sent it out with her owl, Callisto. Callisto flew off, her deep violet wings shining in the summer sun. (She had turned Callisto violet to mach with nearly everything in her house including her own hair and eyes) 

~*~

Sirius walked to the cave in Hogsmeade. He padded along the street getting funny looks from the people at his size. He padded up the hill and into the cave. He lay down at the entrance and stare down at Hogsmeade. He knew some of those people. Most of them from when he was at school. They were leading their kids around scolding them when the kids do something wrong… why scold em? Sirius thinks. I never got scolded and I turned out fine. Well, if you just ignore the fact that I'm a convicted murderer… but that could have happened to anyone in this case.

Sirius stared down at the streets and suddenly noticed a familiar blond. He nearly jumped when she looked his way. He quickly jumped up and ran into the cave. 

__

She saw me… oh noo… Please don't tell anyone Fi… pleeaaseee…He pleaded inside his head he hid in the back of the cave. He prayed she would just assume him another big black dog… but when he heard the footsteps entering the cave he knew she wouldn't.

"Sirius?" she whispered. _She doesn't seem scared… _Sirius thought hopefully, wanting her to know the truth…

"Sirius please, I know your in here, I also know the truth… your innocent… come on out."

Sirius felt as though a large chunk of lead had been lifted from his back as he transformed, leaving himself in clear view.

She nearly fell backwards with surprise. She stared at first. Sirius stared back. He raised a brow slightly wondering if she would say anything.

"Sirius… oh gosh, I'm sorry I-I am kind of used to- to thinking you're a murderer and all…"

He nodded. "Yeah. Most people are." It came out more bitterly than he intended but she seemed to get the picture.

"Well… here you are… I wonder what Maddy would give to be here now…" She let out a nervous laugh. She knew he was innocent but Remus had told about how vicious he had been to the fat lady when she wouldn't let him in… and she was slightly afraid of him losing his temper…

"Maddy? D-does she know the truth?" He stuttered with surprise and hopefulness. 

"Oh, yes she does. Actually I am supposed to be meeting her…"

"Don't tell her I'm here."

Fiora looked slightly surprised and felt the nervousness go right out of her.

"Why not?"

"I want to surprise her." He said with a small grin. HE transformed then and walked over to her as if saying to lead the way. She grinned. _This is the Sirius I used to know. Liking to startle Maddy was a big thing in his life. Haha…_

~*~

Maddy stood there, by Zonko's and waited. _She's 5 minutes late! This isn't like her! _Maddy thought. Then she looked up. Fiora was walking up to her grinning.

"Hey Maddy what's up?"

"Well, your five minutes late… you know I hate people being late! Its soo annoying!"

Fiora couldn't help but laugh. She remembered when Sirius had kept them all waiting for dinner. She nearly stabbed him with a butter knife. No actually she just punched him so hard he was in the hospital wing for a week.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. Nothing." Fi said through giggles. _The look on Sirius' face was unforgettable! I had the biggest crush on him then. But Maddy was dating him. I remember how sad I was when Maddy and him went out for the first time. Haha I nearly cried myself to sleep. _

She looked at Maddy who was staring wide-eyed at something behind Fiora. Fiora had a good idea of what it was. She looked around and saw the big black dog wagging its tail lightly, sitting a few yards away.

"Come here Padfoot! For gods sake I don't think Maddy's going to bite… or stab you with butter knives…" That had been a big joke for quite a few years. (Maddy often said, "I was _joking!_ I wasn't really going to stab him with butter knives!")

She saw an amused look on Sirius' face though it was hard to see on the dog. He padded up and was staring at Maddy nervously. He stopped wagging his tail and just stared at her, his head lowered a bit.

Maddy was so startled suddenly she turned and walked into Zonko's.

She looked like she was going to explode. Her face had gotten all red and her eyes were so wide even Sirius in his dog form was shaking with laughter. After a few moments she peered out of Zonko's.

Sirius looked at Fiora. She knew what he was thinking. He wanted to be in human form. She nodded and walked into Zonko's.

"Maddy?" she giggled slightly "You looked like you were going to explode."

She just muttered under her breath "Omigod Omigod.."

Fiora broke into laughter and walked out of Zonko's to regain her seriousness 

When she felt ready she walked back in.

"Come on Maddy, Sirius wants to be in human form and see you."

Maddy felt nauseous but nodded and let Fiora drag her out. Sirius barked and raced up towards the hills. He had a slight limp that only showed when he ran. Maddy wondered why and what was wrong.

Maddy was dragged to a cave up on the hill she walked in with Fi behind her. Sirius had already transformed and was still staring at her as though it was all a beautiful dream.

He looked away from her suddenly. He had just remembered something.

"I'm sorry." He said. "For everything." He added in a croaky voice. He couldn't stop forgetting that phrase… right when Sirius had gone to Azkaban…

__

~---~

~--Memory--~

Maddy walked into the cell. Sirius glanced up and felt dread overcome his body. He looked back to the floor.

She waited the words seemed to have gotten stuck in her throat. "I hate you Sirius… I hate you more than… than Voldemort himself… I hope you die in this place…" and with that she turned around, tears streaming down her face, and walked out.

~--End of memory--~

~---~

Suddenly he had the urge to get out of there. He had to get out of there… The memory from Azkaban became too much… _I shouldn't have thought about it…_ Apparently Fiora noticed the changes in Sirius mood… 

"Sirius?" she asked. He collapsed to his knees. 

~--*--~

__

"Experience is the passport to wisdom-

Live what you learn and the most

Important lessons are never lost…"

--Anonymous

~--*--~

"I'm so, so sorry…" He said again ignoring Fiora. All he could think of is what he caused. _It's all my fault… _He thought.

Fiora stared at him a little confused. _He was in such a good mood earlier! Maybe Maddy was a little too much for him to handle…_She realized suddenly.

"Hold on a minute… Maddy let me talk to you for a moment…" She pulled Maddy from the cave and stared at her.

"What did you say that night when you went into tell Sirius something? When he was in Azkaban?" Maddy seemed to have forgotten about that…

"I said that I hated him more than Voldemort…"

"Ok." Fiora said. She walked back into the cave but stopped and turned back.

"Ok, I just want to know… do you have _any _idea what the hell he's sorry for..?"

"No… I was trying to figure it out… god this day is soo strange…" Fiora noticed Maddy's eyes. They were an unnatural violet now, so bright that they looked slightly pink. She smiled and turned and walked in. Sirius was in dog form. He had just caught a rat (He always transformed because it was easier to catch them) and was holding in his jaws. He dropped it and transformed a little embarrassed, he walked to the corner of the cave and sat down. 

"Maybe we should go…" Maddy whispered to Fiora, Sirius heard.

"No! I mean… nevermind… sorry…" Sirius looked at the ground.

Fi bit her lip and nodded. They walked out of the cave. Maddy was still feeling sick and suddenly felt so energized. She wanted to turn back and hug Sirius but she couldn't. She felt so strange around him…

~*~

So? How'd y'all like it? I hope its ok. It gets more adventurous later on when Maddy and Fiora get to trust Sirius more. This is the whole starting point. Right now the story hasn't even started. More like a few chapters of a prologue. Well, see you later! REVIEW NOW OR ELSE!

-Hotpunk


	3. Untouchable

~CoNvIcTiOnS~  
  
  
~-~-~-~-~  
  
Sirius hadn't felt this bad in ages. He had tried so hard to wipe that memory from his head completely... he had nearly succeeded. Sirius sat in the cave long into the night, just staring. Staring at the wall like he used to at Azkaban.  
  
~-~-~-~-~  
  
Remus sat up in bed. Ah, a new day. Maybe I'll go visit Fi and Maddy. I haven't seen them since Sunday. He got up and got dressed. He did a few chores around the house; ate; then got some floo powder.   
  
  
When he arrived at Maddy's place, she was still in bed. She wasn't sleeping so Remus decided to get her up.  
  
"Maddy!" he yelled as he walked into her room. She glanced at him and pulled the covers over her head.  
  
"Go 'way" she said drowsily. She had gotten very little sleep last night.  
  
"Oh, come on! I'm inviting you and Fi to go... err... someplace!"  
  
"What place?"  
  
"I'll tell you when I decide where."  
  
She grinned slightly and sat up. Her hair was flying everywhere and was falling into her face. Remus raised a brow.  
  
"Well, I'll go alert Fi. Where shall we go?"  
  
"How about if we just go to Hogsmeade and talk." She said with a bit of hopefulness that made Remus suspicious.  
  
"Ok... I'll go. You get dressed and meet us at the usual spot." He said with a slight grin.  
  
The usual spot. Haha, I don't want to know what you're going to do Remus. You haven't lost your fun streak at all. You just hid it.  
  
~-~  
"Never let the opinion of others keep you  
from doing what's right. Have the courage  
to stand up for your beliefs even in the  
Face of criticism."  
~-~   
  
  
When Maddy met Fi and Remus by Zonkos they were laughing quite hard at the antics of a small boy standing on the other side of the store. They wouldn't tell Maddy, of course, what exactly he had done to make them laugh so hard, so Maddy just forgot about it.  
  
They had a great time. Fi noticed Maddy's eyes lingering on the cave entrance. Remus caught that too.  
  
"What are you looking at, Maddy?"  
  
She turned to him quickly and shook her head. "Oh nothing."  
  
Remus looked at her suspiciously then continued the conversation.  
  
~-~-~-~-~  
  
The temperature had dropped nearly twenty degrees yet Sirius stayed in the cave. Winter was nearing but Sirius wanted to stay there... near everyone he cares about.  
  
He coughed loudly. When he got over the coughing fit he peeked out into Hogsmeade. The streets were deserted for the nighttime except for a few teens hidden in the alleys doing who-knows-what.   
  
His eyes skimmed over the few adults who were walking around, suddenly his eyes stopped on a pair of brilliant violet colored eyes. He stared. She stared back, and then began to make her way towards him. He pulled back and sat at the back of the cave, in a dark corner.  
  
It took her a bit to get up to the area, as in the dark it's hard to travel up a steep hill through prickers and brush. When she made it in, Sirius had gotten into another coughing fit. She came in and sat beside him while he coughed so hard his eyes watered. When he finally gained control he stared at the ground. Whenever she was around his mood hardened.  
  
"Sirius, I didn't mean what I said when you first got into Azkaban. I thought you were guilty but I was wrong, I don't hate you. As a matter of fact I don't hate you one little bit."  
  
He still stared at the ground. He felt a lump in his throat. She had no idea what was wrong. No idea. Though that did help a little...  
  
She suddenly reached over and hugged him. She had started crying. He jumped slightly from the suddenness of it but then tried to comfort her.  
  
"I'm sorry..."  
  
"For what?" she snapped looking up to him, her face blotched from tears.  
  
His face-hardened. He stood up and walked to the other side of the cave. She noticed that his limp shone while he walked now.  
  
"I'm sorry for everything have caused. All the crap that ruined everyone's lives. I'm sorry for leaving Remus alone. I'm sorry for causing you such pain. I'm sorry for making Fi be so mad at me. I'm sorry for what I did to Lily and James..."  
  
"You didn't do anything to them!" She yelled, as she stood up to face him.  
  
"Yes I did! Don't you understand? If I had just stopped thinking about only myself for a change I would have stayed their secret keeper and..." he started but was cut off by Maddy  
  
"...And then they would have come after you till you told them! Either way it would end this way somehow!"  
  
"BUT THEN I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SUCH A FUCKING WIMP AND HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT!"  
  
His bad leg gave out and he collapsed. He lifted the edge of the robes enough to show Maddy his knee. It was horrible. A large chunk of meat was missing from it and it looked infected. His face was filled with rage. Suddenly she felt very scared. She had Fi had talked about Sirius and his temper. They decided it was best to avoid it... too late to think about that now...  
  
"Look at that... see that Maddy? Do you know how I got that? Huh? Do you?"  
  
"N-no..." she said nervously. His eyes widened a crazy look to them. Maybe Azkaban affected him more than we thought.  
  
"I did it. I deserved it. I knew there was something odd about Peter... I shouldn't have trusted him..."  
  
She sat back down and buried her face in her knees. I love you Sirius! Why are you doing this? It isn't your fault!   
  
~-~-~-~-~-~  
  
Fi came out of the fireplace, and shook Remus awake.  
  
"Wahh?"  
  
He said still half asleep. She rolled her eyes and kept shaking him.  
  
"A'right, I'm up, I'm up. What do you want?" He asked a little more bitterly than he meant to. HE wasn't a morning person and since the full moon was in a few days, that didn't help either.  
  
"Well, I want to show you something."  
  
Fi led Remus to Maddy's house. Lying on the couch, was Sirius. HE was looking rather feverish and Maddy was sitting on a chair. She glanced up at Remus.  
  
"Hello. Fi, why did you bring him here? You could have told me first that I was going to have more company than you and Sirius."  
  
Remus looked at Sirius. He frowned.  
  
"Was he in the cave in this weather?" He asked looking outside to the newly fallen snow.  
  
"Yes. I saw him when I went on a nighttime stroll so I went in. Not too pleasant. Lost his temper."  
  
Fi stared at her.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Nothing. I calmed him down."  
  
"Good thing. I haven't seen it, but I hear he can get pretty vicious."  
  
"Dog thing." Remus said plainly.  
  
"He's pretty sick. Coughs so bad he can't take a breath and his eyes water. It almost looks like he's crying! I gave him some potion to help that but it might wear off soon. Remus, you know good healing stuff don't you? His leg is pretty badly mangled..."  
  
Remus took a look at it and put on a face of disgust.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"I don't know exactly..."  
  
"Who did it to him?"  
  
"He did."   
  
"WHAT? He did that to himself?"  
  
Maddy nodded.   
  
Remus remained quiet as he went home to grab something, and worked to heal Sirius' leg while Sirius slept.... If he woke up he wouldn't let anyone near him.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
--======--  
  
I know I know its short, I'm sorry. I'll do better next time.  
  
  
  



End file.
